People always park where they shouldn’t.

Delivery trucks block sidewalks, driveways, and bike lanes. Handicap parking is for everyone, according to some. And Uber Eats drivers park wherever the fuck they want. 

I see it daily at our apartment.

It infuriates me. 

Because it’s dangerous, yes. But mostly because it’s ignorant and lazy.

Seriously, how much time do they save? 30 seconds? A couple of minutes?

You can call it my boomer opinion. You can call it me turning into my old man.

I call it like I see it.

We’ve become selfish as a society. Or, we’re becoming less of a society. There is no more we. Nothing matters more than you and me.

• The delivery man’s package is more valuable than the bike commuter forced to weave into traffic 
• An Uber driver’s time is more precious than an ambulance driver’s time
• Their schedule is more important than your emergency

I don’t know, maybe it’s some kind of Baader-Meinhof situation. I’m seeing it more often because I’m looking for it more often. 

I’m not convinced. 

But that’s not important. What’s important is this.

It’s a race against time

Not fast enough. Do it on the double. Too late. 

We all expect things instantaneously.

At work, at home. How we travel, how we tackle our to-do list.

From the things we buy to the places we buy them. From the goals we seek to the results we expect.

Whatever. Wherever. It all boils down to time.

It’s not our fault. That’s how we’re programmed. That’s how the first world lives. 

We have dopamine drips in our pockets—couple clicks and you’re fixed.

We’ve been taught to see multi-tasking as a superpower. That working after hours day-after-day is an honourable way to live. That the grind is the only way to the top.

We’re led to believe that’s all that matters. The top.

Climb over whoever you must to reach it.

Because the faster you reach it, the more value you have to others. Which becomes the only way you value yourself. 

It’s all bullshit.

The top is always out of reach. Multi-tasking is just half-assed effort. (Less than half-assed, depending on how you split your attention.) And speed doesn’t always mean quality.

It’s all a distraction, really.

A convenient excuse to forget about anybody but yourself. To do as you please.

Imagine we all behaved that way? 

Welcome to The Great Devolution. No fucks given to anyone or anything at anytime.

Dramatics aside.

I can’t control what other people do. So shame on me for expecting them to do anything besides what they want. Or what they’ve been taught.

Shame on me for not focusing on what I control—my actions and my reactions.

It’s a lesson in disguise

I lost my temper with a lawless parker recently.

I had to run some errands. As I’m leaving the apartment building, a delivery truck pulls right up the entrance.

It stops where it’s clearly marked NO PARKING. Right on top of the giant yellow letters, actually.

The driver’s blocking the sidewalk. He’s blocking the throughway for other vehicles. And he’s blocking the only handicap space in the parking lot.

I snapped. 

I asked if he had trouble reading. I called him lazy, I called him ignorant, and I cursed a lot.

The driver stood dumbfounded. I walked away as he fumbled to respond.

I also walked away with less pride.

As quick as the fury flared up, shame replaced it faster. And fiercer.

I embarrassed myself by giving over to anger. I let it cloud my judgement, let it expose a part of myself I’m not proud of.

The driver was parked like an asshole. But there’s no excuse for my behaviour.

I could have dealt with the situation better. I could have exercised a little Stoicism, chosen not to have an opinion. 

“You always own the option of having no opinion. There is never any need to get worked up or to trouble your soul about things you can’t control.”

― Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

Better late than never, I guess. 

There’s a lot of wisdom in Stoicism. Especially for dealing with ignorance and managing anger. 

It reminds you to be tolerant with others and strict with yourself. It pulls the veil on frustrating people and events, revealing them as lessons in patience and restraint.

It’s a better way to live.

I don’t care where you park

My outburst wasn’t worth it. 

It didn’t solve anything.

All that temper tantrum did was make me look like a fool. All that posturing and shouting, all that stress and shame.

Such a waste of time.

That driver—and all those like him—still doesn’t care where he parks. So, why should I?

Honestly, I’d be much happier if I let go of that bitterness. I’d have greater peace of mind if I let go of what I don’t control and hold onto what I do.

People are going to continue to be ignorant and lazy. They’re going to continue to be selfish and thoughtless.

They’re going to continue to do whatever the fuck they want.

The only option is to not let them dictate my emotions and my behaviour. So that’s what I’m going to try to do.

Wish me luck.